Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
