May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
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I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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