i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize