drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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