I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
