Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
