tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
