Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
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