the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
