she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
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It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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