thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
