can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Randomize
