hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
