I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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