How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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