I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
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