I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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