We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
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