Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I love black thongs
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
