Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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