You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
