She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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