"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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