she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Randomize
