To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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