that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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