We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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