I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize