yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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