I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
