did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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