Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Too much gin, very little bucket
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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