woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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