i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
