Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
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