I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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