I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Found your dick twin last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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