Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
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