we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize
