I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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