Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
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I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
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I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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