Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I have tasted many bathrooms
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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