I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Randomize
