East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I see more hoeing in ur future
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