i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
