hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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