Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
