who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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