So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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