Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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