I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
